Here are some tips which I have found over the years, have assisted my clients in some ways, in dealing with this difficult time

1. As difficult as it may be, try to speak to your child/children together about your separation ensuring they understand that you both love them and will remain friends. I appreciate that this may be very difficult; however, the end goal is to ensure that your children are able to have a relationship with you both without seeking to blame any of you for the separation;

2. Agree arrangements for your child/children where possible and if it is safe to do so. Ensure that your children understand that they have two homes which they will love. Give them the emotional reassurance that they can freely enjoy the time with your spouse;

3. Be Open with each other about your finances and try to agree as much as you can whilst taking legal advice as to what is best for your particular circumstances avoid comparing the outcome of other’s cases to yours or relying on google for advice;

4. I know our friends and families want to be there for us and those who have experienced divorce/separation are ever so keen to tell you what to do and not to do. Remember each case is different with different facts and circumstances. The resolution of financial matters in divorce is not one size fits all so don’t be quick to become hostile because you think it will happen as a result of what you have heard;

5. Be prepared to negotiate. You cannot maintain a stance that is unrealistic. Court proceedings should always be the last option so be open to considering alternative dispute resolution methods;

6. Choose a Family lawyer who is a member of Resolution. We are all signed up to the code of conduct to help you balance the financial and emotional costs of your case amongst other things; we also follow the guide to good practice. Our ethos is to deal with matters amicably in order to achieve a fair outcome for you.

The above are just some examples of things you can do to start the process of moving forward, my team and I are available to help you along the way and guide you through this difficult time. The BHP Law family team is members of Resolution with specialist accreditation in children and financial matters and Collaborative Law.

We offer free initial 30 minutes consultation at your convenience either in person or over the telephone so contact us to speak to a member of our friendly and confidential team.